Damiana

Her kisses taste like cinnamon
Potent as a brew of devil's cherries
Her perfume smells likes dark Magic
But she's a White Witch
Airy, ethereal 
She's a thousand sunsets
There's nightshade in her eyes
Fire on her flesh
Spells on her lips
And those candy hot thistles from her tongue
Send érotique surge through your every vein

And you'll never be the same
And you'll never be the same
(unfading love)

Pink mist, black velvet words
- "I've missed you,..
Hold me, don't let go"
Wrap up inside every syllable
She's hypnotic
Lyrical champagne
Her gaze is ... the stars ... and 13 moons
Her fingertips are open roses
Wandering, conjuring
As Amaranth candles burn 
That blush smoke etches your name

And you'll never be the same
And you'll never be the same
(unfading love)

© Kay Irvin

Summer Threnody

Summer romance, be what it may
Sun shines down but can never stay
Leaves fall crisp as the ground turns cold
Burgundies sail, magentas sweep
Birds nestle sleep in beds made of gold

Less and less, he might ask about me
But I tell him what he wants to hear
It shows, we're going through the motions
Emotions sear
Time knows his care hasn't been sincere

Seasons move, seasons lose
Sometimes seem lost
As some lovers do
Autumn arias trace
Maybe there's place
To be found
Mid the fall
With a love who can give all
(as I have, as I would)

Sunburst and bright beauty won't last
That first chill in the air sends cast
There's certain bittersweet appeal
When sunlit reverie goes dark
I'd rather part and find something real

More and more, he's not here, by my side
And I accept it's not meant to be
Promises broke and wishes depart
His heart left me
Sure as Summer fades, comes threnody

Seasons move, seasons lose
Sometimes seem lost
As some lovers do
Autumn arias trace
Maybe there's place
To be found
Mid the fall
With a love who can give all
(as I have, as I would)

© Kay Irvin

A Pitiful Shame

Hell hath no fury
But desire knows no mercy
Loyalty knows no end
Like a woman who fiercely loves
And is truly loved in return
You're turning her away
And that's a pitiful shame

Some past woman did you some wrongs
She's gone but you won't let her go
I've tried to be understanding
You're not giving me a place to grow

If you're not talking about her
You pine, she's your uncertain mood
Fear in your eyes, pause of your voice
Where I know thoughts of me score exclude

I want to give love and you a chance
But you're still hung up on what's over
A past lover, who doesn't love you
We're all passing ships, misdirected,
Mixed signals and it's all for nothing
We always end up back here, my Dear,
No one's in love, no one's being loved
(And that's a pitiful shame)

You say you have feelings for me
You sure the Hell don't show it much
Gone when I need, need but refuse
Fade into your own world and lose touch

It's not as though I'm unshattered
You should be strength for me but - no
For too long, I've been strong for two
And I'm through propping up your ego

Time dies, I won't wait to be loved
I'm not a filler for your ex,
Not a showmance, while your wounds purge,
Not a way station for what comes next

I want to give love and you a chance
But you're still hung up on what's over
A past lover, who doesn't love you
We're all passing ships, misdirected,
Mixed signals and it's all for nothing
We always end up back here, my Dear,
No one's in love, no one's being loved
(And that's a pitiful shame)

When I'm gone, will you cry out my name,
Beat your chest and curse your ragged heart,
Languish as you've done for your old flame,
Who crept your nerve and kept us apart?

Somehow, I bet it won't be the same
You didn't invest yourself in me
(And Baby, that's a pitiful shame)
When I'm gone, will you cry out my name?

Hell hath no fury
But desire knows no mercy
Loyalty knows no end
Like a woman who fiercely loves
And is truly loved in return
You're turning her away
And that's a pitiful shame

© Kay Irvin

Sobriquet

Easily, you could have been my whole world
And as a ribbon,
I would have unfurled ... so deep inside

I wanted to know all the shades of you
-- Submerged, happily,...
Taken by the overwhelming tide

You would only avow me to the edge
I could only beg, helpless, on the ledge
Knowing what we should be but kept at bay
You've made it clear, reflecting my worst fear
Quelled by love's Heartbreaker, into the gray

I've watched what colors others share, bursting
-- The adoring red,
Sepia care, trusting glints of gold

Their arms entangled, exchanging glances,
Private, warm dances,
Meant for them but not for me to hold

You would only avow me to the edge
I could only beg, helpless, on the ledge
Knowing what we should be but kept at bay
You've made it clear, reflecting my worst fear
Quelled by love's Heartbreaker, into the gray

You, my Heartbreaker,...
Loveless wins, there's no prismatic array
-- Lost ... into the gray

~ Sobriquet; (nickname)
Heartbreaker

© Kay Irvin

The Belonging

Dark house, smoldering sage
Winding lanes catch blood from moonbeams
Incandescent cauldron
- that vermilion moon, wakens screams

Footsteps move stealth phantom
But voice makes behest, stalking near 
As the windows rattle,
Chiming, breaking, I feel eyes leer

This home holds many shadows
These walls keep many secrets
All doors and rooms are endless
The belonging now begins

Cold hands touch, my flesh chills
Away doubt, imprint doesn't lie
Steal my breath, seal with kiss
Darkness enfolds with hue and cry

This home holds many shadows
These walls keep many secrets
All doors and rooms are endless
The belonging now begins

(and darkness I became)
(and darkness I became)

My Beloved, come home to me
And I will welcome you with sleep
Dreams, you've not ever imagined
And deathless wed of housed mystique

(the belonging shall be)

© Kay Irvin

Cruel Love

And isn't that how it always seems to be;
About the time you start thinking, 'maybe' 
- is about the time they start backing away.

All relationships start with fire and settle some ... but not dwindle so much that an extremely tiny whimper of a spark would seem fascinating.
And especially when a relationship ends before its had a fair chance to begin.

It can cause more than heartbreak,
more accurately - damage, when people come on with intensity but don't mean it.
It isn't that hard for a person to be honest from the start and not lead another on with amorous convictions, when they lack the grit to follow through.

This is the side of love ... that's cruel

© Kay Irvin

My Little Black Heart

Love, my Darkling
Moon's spellbinding Muse
Delight this Soul
However you choose

Big eyes you have
No one can compare
You dazzle and lure
What big smile you wear

Before you waits
Sacrificial lambs
Long daggers palm
The tall, black door slams

Be still, my little black heart
There's much beauty in the dark
Share it with me
Be still, my little black heart
All which beats, I give to you
Do what you will

Perfumed air drifts
Patchouli and sex
Worshippers vie
Flesh altars for hex

Cabernet kiss
Rocking, black lair thrills
Low music grinds
And the chalice spills

Be still, my little black heart
There's much beauty in the dark
Share it with me
Be still, my little black heart
All which beats, I give to you
Do what you will

© Kay Irvin

The Flowers Have Died

I made you a crown from my future
Burned my past to fight shy of compare
Gave you a garden to palace love
Braved the waywardness you chose to wear

You lamented immortal passion
A ballad-bliss with a poet's breath
But when it was right in front of you
Your indifferent heart bid its death

I would have done anything for you
And I would have draped you in flowers
What could have been - withered to nothing
You wished it away, wasted the hours
(now, the flowers have died)

I built you an altar for romance
Gilt with the splendour of early Spring
But you never placed care or keepsake
You had not an offering to bring

I would have done anything for you
And I would have draped you in flowers
What could have been - withered to nothing
You wished it away, wasted the hours
(now, the flowers have died)

Is it the Melancholy you were after ...
To speak of shattered attempts and how you've cried?
How will those words taste, knowing what you denied?
(now, the flowers have died)
(now, the flowers have died)

© Kay Irvin

Indigo

Tossing, turning, sleep eludes me
All I think of is indigo
And with that, my mind is racing
Restless thoughts have nothing else to know
(but your sweet love)

Your hands, your dulcet fingertips
My skin keeps constant memory
How powerless I am with you
Blue room, blue eyes, bluer than the sea

Reliving each moment, last with you
How your body commands, pleads and moves
Breathy, risqué echoes haunt with hue

Rain's tapping outside the window
Leaves and branches flash, rapping slow
Night rumbles after lightning's glow
Restless thoughts have nothing else to know
(but your sweet love)

And I feel you within the thunder
I can't escape this spell I'm under
(my indigo)
Your love completely captivates me
Blue room, blue eyes, bluer than the sea
(my indigo)

© Kay Irvin

Sanguine

Come and dance with me, slowly
With haunting, love songs that collide
Our embrace, like hot elixir
Quenching bond, we both feel inside

(I want to drink of your soul)

Everything I am - is yours
You're my world, you make it sublime
I belong to you, entirely
And you'll belong to me ... in time

(I want to drink of your soul)

Who cares about others or how they might perceive us to be
Their vanilla lust often crumbles to dust
They'll never know the taste of a touch for dark lovers, as we 

Let me be the love you've not had
And only the night sky be clad
(by the shimmering depth of your eyes)

Pair with me, sleeping fantasies
Trust with me, tranquil mysteries
(We'll be dream weavers, fevers shall rise)

Come, fill this fierce trembling and thirst that sends me out of control
My love, how I want to stay wrapped in you and drink of your soul
(to infinity)

(infinity)

© Kay Irvin

Winter Spell

So many people, so many promises
So many lies, when they all swore they would stay
I've been disillusioned, yet fell, overtaken
Hoping against hope they wouldn't go away

Frost on encounters, frost on hands that make reach
Could it be to belong or am I snow blind?
Icicles and prisms bewitch with visions
But are cold to the depths, disguised as designed

I want today, tomorrow and forever
I need to believe 'neath this Winter white spell
Feel a warmth I've never had or imagined
Sweep over me, melt this iced fear that befell

Shatter this atmosphere that courses my blood
Smash and free, give to me - endless, burning love

New Winter tale
Winter spell (our love)
Icicles and prisms bewitch with visions
Our own world (our love)
New Winter tale
Winter spell (our amazing love)

© Kay Irvin

Bloodwine

You don't seek to know me
Convinced that you perceive me well
I try getting closer
Your icy distance burns like Hell

I love you like bloodwine
But you turn on like lemonade
Sugar-sour tease with sting
Who wrecks my mind like a grenade

When I'm with you I want forever 
When I'm with you I want out
When I'm with you I am quite certain
When I'm with you I have doubt
(but I love you like bloodwine) 

In so many ways I attempt to need 
Frustration is aware I'm crushing deep
I know I may not return from the break
If illusion is enamoured to leap
It's a long way down
It's a long way down
Torn between what I wish we were and this
It's a long way down
It's a long way down

When I'm with you I want forever 
When I'm with you I want out
When I'm with you I am quite certain
When I'm with you I have doubt
(but I love you like bloodwine) 

© Kay Irvin

Old Souls

Love is ... fragile as a whisper
Love is ... haunting as soft, first glimpse
Intense as complete possession
Vulnerable as it's immense

Carried across distance and time
Old souls, the other half, twin flame
Exquisite sense often followed
Oh, but now the one has a name

I know the hurt was worth the wait
Watching couples go enraptured
I felt invisible to love
But you found, you see, I'm captured

Love is ... fragile as a whisper
Love is ... haunting as soft, first glimpse
Intense as complete possession
Vulnerable as it's immense

Love is ... you
Love is ... you
Every part of you
I love

© Kay Irvin

Innamorare

With a wink, you shake my pain's rust
With a touch, you remove my scars
And turn it all to silver dust
Thrown to the universe for stars

I don't know how you do it
Picking flowers where shadows fall
Take my tears and make diamonds
With a glance, break down every wall

I know that I could be detrimental to your world
But you run circles 'round my excuses to let you in
It's a heady feeling, wanting more than I deserve
You make it easy for me to allow the draw and rush

(to fall in love)
(to fall in love)

You cast my fears off with a kiss
You keep the jackals bound by chains
Decorate old Hell with new bliss
Seduce like absinthe and champagnes

I don't know how you do it
Picking flowers where shadows fall
Take my tears and make diamonds
With a glance, break down every wall

I know that I could be detrimental to your world
But you run circles 'round my excuses to let you in
It's a heady feeling, wanting more than I deserve
You make it easy for me to allow the draw and rush

(to fall in love)
(to fall in love)

© Kay Irvin

Muse

You tempt me with your smile
Write poetry with your sighs
Paint my eyes, you're versatile
Roused my sleeping butterflies
(never felt this before)
(never knew I wanted to)

Wanna disappear
Inside you, again and again
And never let this fire end
Not touch, not hear, not know anything else
Only how much you mean to me
What I've prayed for, what I've ached for
You have awakened
Don't you know love awaits epiphany?

You need to understand
A Muse can be inspired too
I'm just like clay in your hand
Sculpt my heart for only you
(never felt this before)
(never knew I wanted to)

Wanna disappear
Inside you, again and again
And never let this fire end
Not touch, not hear, not know anything else
Only how much you mean to me
What I've prayed for, what I've ached for
You have awakened
Don't you know love awaits epiphany?

A million kisses wouldn't be enough
'Cause only more love heals this bleeding love

(I wanna burn with you)
(Into the ethereal)

(I wanna burn with you)
(Into the ethereal)

© Kay Irvin

~ did a bit of a tilt on this one
A Muse can inspire ... But also be inspired

Unrequited

Can't imagine you'd deny me
Can't let myself fall to despair
I believe in happy endings
Just want the start to find you care

Enable me to come closer
Hypnotic, you're drug in my veins
And no, there can't be another
Or nothing left of me remains

Unrequited, unrequited (love)
So excited for the chance
You'll put me above (the rest)
Unrequited, unrequited (love)
Darling, ignited in trance
You're all I think of (my quest)

You're an angel, I'm your devil
Thinking of you explicitly
Touch, feeling your breath on my neck
Holding you, tasting, heavenly

Your name is honey on my tongue
An indulgence and I repeat
Within my slow dreams and soft moans
A fever,... salt, sweat, dripping sweet

Unrequited, unrequited (love)
So excited for the chance
You'll put me above (the rest)
Unrequited, unrequited (love)
Darling, ignited in trance
You're all I think of (my quest)

© Kay Irvin

Saudade

Tell me your fears
And I'll tell you mine
Watch the sunset
Bleeding love streaks 
Across the skyline

Dear, hold your breath
Make wishes, then sleep
Dream of me, there
My tender touch
Yours to ever keep

We are apart
But my presence stays
And when night comes
Feel me with you
As the moonlight plays

Time is lonely
My empty bed waits
For your safe arms
For your exhale
As each wish creates

Love that remains, always
Love always remains

© Kay Irvin

The Whispering Trees

Obscure light, again bring flicker
Walls and portraits rattle like bones
Darkly dread closes in thicker
When thunder drums with baleful tones

All souls come 'round, gather and share
Bind be for those who covet harm
Bid shed of our sorrows that snare
Let the rains sweep darkness with charm

Whispering trees, black rain, storm dwells
Leaves tip tears, glistering ground wells
But voices blend as wolfen wails
When slumberless candlelight swells

Foggy river bends, sketch out caim
Shadowcast loving memories
From the willows to wax and flame
Send warmth through weeping tapestries

All souls come 'round, gather and share
Bind be for those who covet harm
Bid shed of our sorrows that snare
Let the rains sweep darkness with charm

Whispering trees, black rain, storm dwells
Leaves tip tears, glistering ground wells
But voices blend as wolfen wails
When slumberless candlelight swells

© Kay Irvin

~ a circle of protection, in times of need
Those we love are with us, always

Limerence

Love sends out but does not come back
And a restless mind cannot sleep,
As the night and darkest places,
- everything goes black

The need to make you feel
The need to make it real
- may take you by surprise
It's a long time coming,
For this devoted, lovelorn Soul

You don't know what it's like
To watch the one you love
- love someone else
You don't know what it's like
To live so intensely
- lost within love, itself

I can't focus, nothing is clear 
And the days seem smothered by cold,
As the Winter blankets the ground, 
- the world could disappear

The need to have you see
The need to have you be
- the one who fills this void
It's all that matters now,
For this devoted, lovelorn Soul 

You don't know what it's like
To watch the one you love
- love someone else
You don't know what it's like
To live so intensely
- lost within love, itself

Take my heart, all of me
You've already stolen my Soul
And love is slowly killing me
But I just can't let go

© Kay Irvin

note:
Many things interest me and I write about
all sorts of things; hauntings, ghosts, vampires, werewolves, dark, gothic, nightmares (often) ...
wolves (definitely) ...
And (in reference to) likes/beliefs/old ways; nature, night time, weather, Wiccan, the elements, seasons ...
And emotions; love, anger, rage, sadness
and hurt - some from myself but also
from what others discuss, or from music,
artwork and movies. (a bit of everything)
But I also sometimes write about things
in relation to kind of physcological topics;
depression, rumination ... Limerence
A sunny, Summer, butterflies & glitter gal,
I'm not. :)
There's a great article on 'Limerence'
and I want to share the link because it,
(and the person who wrote it) can explain
it far better than I could.
~ Thanks

http://bthaw.blogspot.com/2011/08/guide-to-limerence.html?m=1

The Damned

It was a beautiful dream
But it was taken away
People aren't what they seem
- just passing through without stay

A nothing love, a thousand sunsets
Ghostly memories of silhouettes
- Oh, they taunt and beckon for the damned

And when the room draws empty
Bitter honesty is known
It's better than being with another
Who wears a lie and makes you feel alone

Pirouettes and masquerade
Moving poetry, melodies glide
Though the outcome is unswayed
When the mask falls, you see what's inside

And when the room draws empty
Bitter honesty is known
It's better than being with another
Who wears a lie and makes you feel alone

A nothing love, a thousand sunsets
Ghostly memories of silhouettes
- Oh, they taunt and beckon for the damned

© Kay Irvin

Nightfall

When will this long Summer end?
The sunlight has not been a friend
I wait for darkness,... to descend

In the stillness 
In the shadows
There is a truth
When hurry slows
Pale, distant lights
Soft wind may call
But just a name
Into nightfall

Pictures and memories burn
They've taken enough, had their turn
Something new is easy to yearn

Time passed, still much is ahead 
It won't own me or be mislead 
When only a whisper's been said

I'll be here, when echoes come through,
Without fear, as the seasons change
I'll be closer to finding you

In the stillness 
In the shadows
There is a truth
When hurry slows
Pale, distant lights
Soft wind may call
But just a name
Into nightfall

© Kay Irvin

Pull-Push

I'm so ... nice and sweet
I'm angry and cold
You so ... want me here
You want me to go

Write me love letters
Write me a hate rant
Really, moody much?
(- tantrum slices slant)

Go on, call me names
'Cause I mute at will
Opened up my life 
But kept secrets, still

Say I self-pity
- that's a load that's full
You wallow in it,
Hypocritical 

All that's wrong with me
- is people like you,
who make me confused
Pull me close to you
And how you love me
Tick-tock, five seconds
And how you judge me
Push me away, it's a mind game - cliché,
Manipulate emotions and betray
Lash out - you don't want anyone to stay
You intentionally hurt, make it play

My phone will have no answer
As mail, return to sender
No more of your whiplash mock
Straight to spam, delete and block

© Kay Irvin