Bottle of Sun

There's a gun to my heart, held by your love
I'm frozen as Winter
And if the shot rings I know my dreams will shatter
Like icicles breaking, out to the beyond
All will be gone ... if you turn me away
Close to you is where I must stay

Around the corner
Down the street
Outside your house
And at your feet
I'll always be near

Within the silence
Under your bed
Above the noise
Inside your head
I'll always be here

Life doesn't make sense but why can't we?
My blood runs cold and I need your light
My world is night
A dark existence
Nothing eases this pain but to see your face
(when you smile)
I'm beguiled
And don't want this feeling to leave

Am I wrong, to say you're mine?
(in my mind, you are mine)
Maybe your answer is something I shouldn't know
Then our bond will never let go
Behind this wall of ice
I see the warmth of your eyes
Like a bottle of sun
And I won't share you with anyone

Around the corner
Down the street
Outside your house
And at your feet
I'll always be near

Within the silence
Under your bed
Above the noise
Inside your head
I'll always be here

© Kay Irvin

-- a little Vampire-Stalker lyrics
for the soon Autumn/Halloween season

Crystalline

Star child, something in your eyes that shine
Long ago, once as mine, crystalline
But life took it away (gone away)

So many footsteps
So many teardrops
Oh, the confusion
Asking when it stops

Just a soft, slow place
Home that resonates
Time heals but time kills
Our story creates

Star child, something in your eyes that shine
Long ago, once as mine, crystalline
But life took it away (gone away)

Wanting some beauty
Tethered with anchor
And 'neath all that weight
Also tows anger

Like wearing thistles
It's a bloody mess
Dragging destruction
Clouded to digress

Star child, something in your eyes that shine
Long ago, once as mine, crystalline
But life took it away (gone away)

It's a depressing world, someone once said
I think it was me
When the day fell to a night that was dead
A million sorrows played Hell with my head

Star child, something in your eyes that shine
Long ago, once as mine, crystalline
But life took it away (gone away)

We don't always have a choice
We don't always have a voice
But our space makes a difference anyway

© Kay Irvin

Misery Loves Company

I'm his uncompleted sentence
I'm his new, uncommitted thought
-- a pacify for his abandonment
Where another woman left him to rot

He's a whiskey shot from meltdown
He's the implosion in my brain
He says things I've heard before, kiss of death
Sure wreck, volatile, once aboard that train

I'm a convenience, stepping stone
Who gets him farther from his past
And misery loves company
But that perspective won't drain me
Whose magnetism won't pull me
With paradox which won't slay me
(won't be me)

I can see the postwar love
Full-on, vacant deduction
Accurate with hardcore crush
I can see the destruction

I'm his unfinished transition
I'm his similar reflection
-- dark places, swimming among unslept eyes
Stories of betrayal and rejection

He's a whiskey shot from meltdown
He's the implosion in my brain
He says things I've heard before, kiss of death
Sure wreck, volatile, once aboard that train

I can see the postwar love
Full-on, vacant deduction
Accurate with hardcore crush 
I can see the destruction

© Kay Irvin

Liaison

Full, white, satin moon
Hanging high and bright
Owls heard, wings rustle
Presence, out of sight
Heaviness drapes tale
Like a veil that's cut from a black lace night

Oh, his eyes have wandered 
Oh, soft lies have pondered
-- a liaison, which would split us apart 

And I'll hear it in his voice
And I'll smell it on his flesh
And I'll feel it with his hand
-- pulse and tempo as to thresh

Myrrh and cypress burn
And the room grows dense
Music plays, oppressed
As the mood flows tense
All we seek to do
Cues, not without the coil of consequence

Oh, his lust has taken
Oh, love has forsaken
-- a liaison, which would split us apart 

And I'll hear it in his voice
And I'll smell it on his flesh
And I'll feel it with his hand
-- pulse and tempo as to thresh

Oh, time stays unspoken
Oh, gaze not yet broken
But it weighs as it splays 
-- a liaison, which will split us apart 

© Kay Irvin

Autumn Love

Bright romance was a waste of time and cruel
One sided light to catch
One way compromise by its rule
But I refuse to chase

When you've known love to only palace scars
You need someone the same
To open and release the stars
Dark romance, tears, embrace 

Tortured souls with tormented charms
Be welcomed place mid sheltered arms
And within our darkness, we have come home

Autumn eyes, whose changing colors collide
Are seasoned with struggle
Stormy depths to get lost inside
Familiar with refrain

Deep kisses, hungry with a hint to bleed
Are less about the want
And so much more about the need
Unabridged, starved by pain

Tortured souls with tormented charms
Be welcomed place mid sheltered arms
And within our darkness, love has come home

Always outside, while others held the Spring
Always outside, while Summer singe would sting
But now, doors invite us for everything

Tortured souls with tormented charms
Be welcomed place mid sheltered arms
And within our darkness, love has come home

© Kay Irvin

Cerebral Agony Zine

Recently, Dave from Cerebral Agony Zine was kind enough to publish ten of my poems and interview me.
It was a pleasure to speak with him, via email and messaging, and I truly appreciate the time he took to share my poems/lyrics and talk with me.
Dave works very hard to spotlight musicians and writers on his web page (Zine) and promote their work.
Thank you, Dave ...

Sharing the link, here, in this post.
I invite everyone to visit and check it out,
as well as the contributions of other artists.

http://cerebralagonyzine.blogspot.com/2015/08/interview-with-kay-irvin.html?m=1 

Dans le Noir

Picture perfect, hands entwined
Desires that hunger, that feed
Broad strokes, as we, undefined
Still doesn't cease want and need

Scarlet sunsets dim, gray drips
Noir sceneries flood my eyes
And too soon our fingertips
Slip their last, vast into whys

Your cold words tattooed 'cross my heart
Indelible and deep but not as deep
As the words that were never said
There's no going back, there's no where to run
When life unfolds love and madness
I can't escape, these tormented thoughts shred
What kept me alive, now inscribed
(the hurt is done)

Profound disillusion preys
I haven't the will to face
It's crumbling, tumbling and weighs
Oh, its downcast won't erase

I want to scream, make you feel
Rally up rage, wake your view
To have you know just how real
This love bestowed unto you

(But now, what good would it do?)

Your cold words tattooed 'cross my heart
Indelible and deep but not as deep
As the words that were never said
There's no going back, there's no where to run
When life unfolds love and madness
I can't escape, these tormented thoughts shred
What kept me alive, now inscribed
(the hurt is done)

It's all too late
Our time has passed
My world has crashed
(into the dark)

© Kay Irvin

Cecil's Song

Lionheart, my wild friend
Gone to open fields, endless lakes
And though the Heavens weep
Courage forms on the horizon

My friend, I saw your face in the clouds
You closed your eyes and welcomed the breeze
Mane blowing 'cross a majestic sky
I wept with the rain, fell to my knees

Envious shadows crept 
Their hands laid out with blood and chains
Shamed men without honour
But none can take your memory

Now, the storms have meaning
Your freedom roars with the thunder
Your beauty is inside
And your pride surrounds with glory

My friend, I saw your face in the clouds
You closed your eyes and welcomed the breeze
Mane blowing 'cross a majestic sky
I wept with the rain, fell to my knees

Lionheart, hands won't ever harm or reach
Love is with you, walk beside the angels
Go home, go home, go home and be at peace

© Kay Irvin

~ for Cecil the lion

Maze

How is it we've tried for close but end with far?
This and we've hardly challenged the odds to win
Maybe, the middle is where we made a start
Seems passion passed and we never settled in

You know so little, I try but answers bend
Around the corner, then they're gone and I chase
Lost, the hazy night is cold without your tend
No hand to guide, to assure reach and embrace

Shadows fall, hide and seek play beneath faint moon
My eyes are tired, as with every, heavy step
This laden path coils vague but its clear be soon
As exit's shown, its loss leads, none to forget

All I know is this tremendous love I hold
Wanted to give itself, entirely to you
But you wouldn't take, didn't want, didn't need
There's a hole in my heart, where chance could have filled
But whose course would only have this love to bleed

© Kay Irvin

The Gothic Queen

Summertale, take your leave
Winter, make bow before your turn
These Autumnal eyes weave
That fire held deep but now shall burn

Time will haunt, sable gowns reclaim 
Blood red horizons will kiss the skies
Trees will weep tears, as drops of flame
Witches will dance and rapt throne shall rise

Bard and Muse rendering
The lakes will chill and as the breeze
Your body whelms, trembling
Aria speaks - now, to your knees

Haunt will harvest shadows waking 
Apples will rot but hot spice will thrive
Dark pleasures are for the taking
Vampires will hunt, reign shall come alive

Sunny days fled, not to look back
Those unfaithful roses thorned some fools
Gilded irony, edge of black
Whose loyal scepter shall blaze and rules

© Kay Irvin

The Sun Can Betray

It's a sad, sad story
And it happens every day
That which grace loses glory
And how the sun can betray

People ride promises in like a storm
Wreck havoc and blow out on a breeze
Never knowing, never giving a damn
About all the damage that they leave

They see a calm and want its destruction
They see some struggle and want it worse
Everyone else is pushed to rock bottom 
They only worry 'bout being first

It's a sad, sad story
And it happens every day
That which grace loses glory
And how the sun can betray

- Some - gorgeous, drop dead girls, snag a taker
Their guys later complain, there's no care
Femme, bat lash eyes rove out a wandering
Searching out, new lover to ensnare

- Some - bad boys will charm but are unstable
Bad is the word a girl might forget
His hand can turn from tender to heavy
Her wishes trade for bruise and regret

Such bright shining things draw a hopeful heart
Be sure in what it is and what it seems
Love is a fragile gift that when broken
Can be lost and its Soul never redeems

It's a sad, sad story
And it happens every day
That which grace loses glory
And how the sun can betray

© Kay Irvin

Slow Burn

Oh, your words land a sting
I denied what you said
It took awhile to ring
Over and over
Again and again
Telling me everything

In the moment, was numb
Clambering for love's need
Though it would never come
It became surreal
Inevitable
Singe would have me succumb

And there's a slow burn in my heart
I can feel you depart (from me)
How much more time is left?
How long will it be?
You're dragging it out
If you're bound to leave
End this misery (set us free)
Dying love is slow burn

Once, as close as we were
Thought it was forever
Tomorrow, nothing's sure
The hourglass breaks
Sand blows to the wind
Fragments, when love was pure

Oh, your words land a sting
I denied what you said
It took awhile to ring
Over and over
Again and again
Telling me everything

And there's a slow burn in my heart
I can feel you depart (from me)
How much more time is left?
How long will it be?
You're dragging it out
If you're bound to leave 
End this misery (set us free)
Dying love is slow burn

© Kay Irvin

Black Tears

These black tears welling, are they vain?
Tell me, again, about ... years from now
Let me believe just for a while
And then,... I'll get over it somehow

You're hurting me, confusing me
Calling me, 'Angel', talking of love
While saying you're not over her
And that makes me feel, I'm not enough
(a nothing, offering)

Black tears, black wings, black eyes, black Soul
You control ... how deep the cut goes
With every touch, (unsung), like a razor
And stinging edges of an unhad kiss
I give of myself, support and strength
My love bleeds, I want to be your needs
But I know you wish it was her
(I know you wish it was her)
(I know you wish it was her)

You've obtained the all consuming
You've had bright, wild hearts and settled throne
I've never been the precious Queen
Those things, those things, I have never known
(more nothing, gutwrenching)

My past only knew a few hims
When darkness claimed with everything numb
Oh, I've waited to hear your words
And I never really thought they'd come

My love bleeds, I want to be your needs
But I know you wish it was her
(I know you wish it was her)
(I know you wish it was her)

If you held me, I'd cry
And you'd ask me why
I'd say, 'a lifetime'
(you may be my last try)

Your Angel, black tears, black wings
But I know you wish it was her
(I know you wish it was her)
(I know you wish it was her)

© Kay Irvin

And Then There's Honesty

I'm slow to trust
But love too hard
Intense with care
And that can leave a scar
When someone disappears

Want to believe
Hold back, instead
Front with a smile
With chaos in my head
Damage, ruins from the years

If love would fight for me
I would never let go
This much I know

Can't still the pain
Can't kill the past
I get depressed
Can true bond really last?
To me, it's a riddle 

Hope has its guard
Reach has resist
I try to try
But dark places exist
I battle the middle

If love would fight for me
I would never let go
This much I know

© Kay Irvin

Damiana

Her kisses taste like cinnamon
Potent as a brew of devil's cherries
Her perfume smells likes dark Magic
But she's a White Witch
Airy, ethereal 
She's a thousand sunsets
There's nightshade in her eyes
Fire on her flesh
Spells on her lips
And those candy hot thistles from her tongue
Send érotique surge through your every vein

And you'll never be the same
And you'll never be the same
(unfading love)

Pink mist, black velvet words
- "I've missed you,..
Hold me, don't let go"
Wrap up inside every syllable
She's hypnotic
Lyrical champagne
Her gaze is ... the stars ... and 13 moons
Her fingertips are open roses
Wandering, conjuring
As Amaranth candles burn 
That blush smoke etches your name

And you'll never be the same
And you'll never be the same
(unfading love)

© Kay Irvin

Summer Threnody

Summer romance, be what it may
Sun shines down but can never stay
Leaves fall crisp as the ground turns cold
Burgundies sail, magentas sweep
Birds nestle sleep in beds made of gold

Less and less, he might ask about me
But I tell him what he wants to hear
It shows, we're going through the motions
Emotions sear
Time knows his care hasn't been sincere

Seasons move, seasons lose
Sometimes seem lost
As some lovers do
Autumn arias trace
Maybe there's place
To be found
Mid the fall
With a love who can give all
(as I have, as I would)

Sunburst and bright beauty won't last
That first chill in the air sends cast
There's certain bittersweet appeal
When sunlit reverie goes dark
I'd rather part and find something real

More and more, he's not here, by my side
And I accept it's not meant to be
Promises broke and wishes depart
His heart left me
Sure as Summer fades, comes threnody

Seasons move, seasons lose
Sometimes seem lost
As some lovers do
Autumn arias trace
Maybe there's place
To be found
Mid the fall
With a love who can give all
(as I have, as I would)

© Kay Irvin

A Pitiful Shame

Hell hath no fury
But desire knows no mercy
Loyalty knows no end
Like a woman who fiercely loves
And is truly loved in return
You're turning her away
And that's a pitiful shame

Some past woman did you some wrongs
She's gone but you won't let her go
I've tried to be understanding
You're not giving me a place to grow

If you're not talking about her
You pine, she's your uncertain mood
Fear in your eyes, pause of your voice
Where I know thoughts of me score exclude

I want to give love and you a chance
But you're still hung up on what's over
A past lover, who doesn't love you
We're all passing ships, misdirected,
Mixed signals and it's all for nothing
We always end up back here, my Dear,
No one's in love, no one's being loved
(And that's a pitiful shame)

You say you have feelings for me
You sure the Hell don't show it much
Gone when I need, need but refuse
Fade into your own world and lose touch

It's not as though I'm unshattered
You should be strength for me but - no
For too long, I've been strong for two
And I'm through propping up your ego

Time dies, I won't wait to be loved
I'm not a filler for your ex,
Not a showmance, while your wounds purge,
Not a way station for what comes next

I want to give love and you a chance
But you're still hung up on what's over
A past lover, who doesn't love you
We're all passing ships, misdirected,
Mixed signals and it's all for nothing
We always end up back here, my Dear,
No one's in love, no one's being loved
(And that's a pitiful shame)

When I'm gone, will you cry out my name,
Beat your chest and curse your ragged heart,
Languish as you've done for your old flame,
Who crept your nerve and kept us apart?

Somehow, I bet it won't be the same
You didn't invest yourself in me
(And Baby, that's a pitiful shame)
When I'm gone, will you cry out my name?

Hell hath no fury
But desire knows no mercy
Loyalty knows no end
Like a woman who fiercely loves
And is truly loved in return
You're turning her away
And that's a pitiful shame

© Kay Irvin

Sobriquet

Easily, you could have been my whole world
And as a ribbon,
I would have unfurled ... so deep inside

I wanted to know all the shades of you
-- Submerged, happily,...
Taken by the overwhelming tide

You would only avow me to the edge
I could only beg, helpless, on the ledge
Knowing what we should be but kept at bay
You've made it clear, reflecting my worst fear
Quelled by love's Heartbreaker, into the gray

I've watched what colors others share, bursting
-- The adoring red,
Sepia care, trusting glints of gold

Their arms entangled, exchanging glances,
Private, warm dances,
Meant for them but not for me to hold

You would only avow me to the edge
I could only beg, helpless, on the ledge
Knowing what we should be but kept at bay
You've made it clear, reflecting my worst fear
Quelled by love's Heartbreaker, into the gray

You, my Heartbreaker,...
Loveless wins, there's no prismatic array
-- Lost ... into the gray

~ Sobriquet; (nickname)
Heartbreaker

© Kay Irvin

The Belonging

Dark house, smoldering sage
Winding lanes catch blood from moonbeams
Incandescent cauldron
- that vermilion moon, wakens screams

Footsteps move stealth phantom
But voice makes behest, stalking near 
As the windows rattle,
Chiming, breaking, I feel eyes leer

This home holds many shadows
These walls keep many secrets
All doors and rooms are endless
The belonging now begins

Cold hands touch, my flesh chills
Away doubt, imprint doesn't lie
Steal my breath, seal with kiss
Darkness enfolds with hue and cry

This home holds many shadows
These walls keep many secrets
All doors and rooms are endless
The belonging now begins

(and darkness I became)
(and darkness I became)

My Beloved, come home to me
And I will welcome you with sleep
Dreams, you've not ever imagined
And deathless wed of housed mystique

(the belonging shall be)

© Kay Irvin

Cruel Love

And isn't that how it always seems to be;
About the time you start thinking, 'maybe' 
- is about the time they start backing away.

All relationships start with fire and settle some ... but not dwindle so much that an extremely tiny whimper of a spark would seem fascinating.
And especially when a relationship ends before its had a fair chance to begin.

It can cause more than heartbreak,
more accurately - damage, when people come on with intensity but don't mean it.
It isn't that hard for a person to be honest from the start and not lead another on with amorous convictions, when they lack the grit to follow through.

This is the side of love ... that's cruel

© Kay Irvin

My Little Black Heart

Love, my Darkling
Moon's spellbinding Muse
Delight this Soul
However you choose

Big eyes you have
No one can compare
You dazzle and lure
What big smile you wear

Before you waits
Sacrificial lambs
Long daggers palm
The tall, black door slams

Be still, my little black heart
There's much beauty in the dark
Share it with me
Be still, my little black heart
All which beats, I give to you
Do what you will

Perfumed air drifts
Patchouli and sex
Worshippers vie
Flesh altars for hex

Cabernet kiss
Rocking, black lair thrills
Low music grinds
And the chalice spills

Be still, my little black heart
There's much beauty in the dark
Share it with me
Be still, my little black heart
All which beats, I give to you
Do what you will

© Kay Irvin

The Flowers Have Died

I made you a crown from my future
Burned my past to fight shy of compare
Gave you a garden to palace love
Braved the waywardness you chose to wear

You lamented immortal passion
A ballad-bliss with a poet's breath
But when it was right in front of you
Your indifferent heart bid its death

I would have done anything for you
And I would have draped you in flowers
What could have been - withered to nothing
You wished it away, wasted the hours
(now, the flowers have died)

I built you an altar for romance
Gilt with the splendour of early Spring
But you never placed care or keepsake
You had not an offering to bring

I would have done anything for you
And I would have draped you in flowers
What could have been - withered to nothing
You wished it away, wasted the hours
(now, the flowers have died)

Is it the Melancholy you were after ...
To speak of shattered attempts and how you've cried?
How will those words taste, knowing what you denied?
(now, the flowers have died)
(now, the flowers have died)

© Kay Irvin

Indigo

Tossing, turning, sleep eludes me
All I think of is indigo
And with that, my mind is racing
Restless thoughts have nothing else to know
(but your sweet love)

Your hands, your dulcet fingertips
My skin keeps constant memory
How powerless I am with you
Blue room, blue eyes, bluer than the sea

Reliving each moment, last with you
How your body commands, pleads and moves
Breathy, risqué echoes haunt with hue

Rain's tapping outside the window
Leaves and branches flash, rapping slow
Night rumbles after lightning's glow
Restless thoughts have nothing else to know
(but your sweet love)

And I feel you within the thunder
I can't escape this spell I'm under
(my indigo)
Your love completely captivates me
Blue room, blue eyes, bluer than the sea
(my indigo)

© Kay Irvin

Sanguine

Come and dance with me, slowly
With haunting, love songs that collide
Our embrace, like hot elixir
Quenching bond, we both feel inside

(I want to drink of your soul)

Everything I am - is yours
You're my world, you make it sublime
I belong to you, entirely
And you'll belong to me ... in time

(I want to drink of your soul)

Who cares about others or how they might perceive us to be
Their vanilla lust often crumbles to dust
They'll never know the taste of a touch for dark lovers, as we 

Let me be the love you've not had
And only the night sky be clad
(by the shimmering depth of your eyes)

Pair with me, sleeping fantasies
Trust with me, tranquil mysteries
(We'll be dream weavers, fevers shall rise)

Come, fill this fierce trembling and thirst that sends me out of control
My love, how I want to stay wrapped in you and drink of your soul
(to infinity)

(infinity)

© Kay Irvin

Winter Spell

So many people, so many promises
So many lies, when they all swore they would stay
I've been disillusioned, yet fell, overtaken
Hoping against hope they wouldn't go away

Frost on encounters, frost on hands that make reach
Could it be to belong or am I snow blind?
Icicles and prisms bewitch with visions
But are cold to the depths, disguised as designed

I want today, tomorrow and forever
I need to believe 'neath this Winter white spell
Feel a warmth I've never had or imagined
Sweep over me, melt this iced fear that befell

Shatter this atmosphere that courses my blood
Smash and free, give to me - endless, burning love

New Winter tale
Winter spell (our love)
Icicles and prisms bewitch with visions
Our own world (our love)
New Winter tale
Winter spell (our amazing love)

© Kay Irvin

Bloodwine

You don't seek to know me
Convinced that you perceive me well
I try getting closer
Your icy distance burns like Hell

I love you like bloodwine
But you turn on like lemonade
Sugar-sour tease with sting
Who wrecks my mind like a grenade

When I'm with you I want forever 
When I'm with you I want out
When I'm with you I am quite certain
When I'm with you I have doubt
(but I love you like bloodwine) 

In so many ways I attempt to need 
Frustration is aware I'm crushing deep
I know I may not return from the break
If illusion is enamoured to leap
It's a long way down
It's a long way down
Torn between what I wish we were and this
It's a long way down
It's a long way down

When I'm with you I want forever 
When I'm with you I want out
When I'm with you I am quite certain
When I'm with you I have doubt
(but I love you like bloodwine) 

© Kay Irvin

Old Souls

Love is ... fragile as a whisper
Love is ... haunting as soft, first glimpse
Intense as complete possession
Vulnerable as it's immense

Carried across distance and time
Old souls, the other half, twin flame
Exquisite sense often followed
Oh, but now the one has a name

I know the hurt was worth the wait
Watching couples go enraptured
I felt invisible to love
But you found, you see, I'm captured

Love is ... fragile as a whisper
Love is ... haunting as soft, first glimpse
Intense as complete possession
Vulnerable as it's immense

Love is ... you
Love is ... you
Every part of you
I love

© Kay Irvin

Innamorare

With a wink, you shake my pain's rust
With a touch, you remove my scars
And turn it all to silver dust
Thrown to the universe for stars

I don't know how you do it
Picking flowers where shadows fall
Take my tears and make diamonds
With a glance, break down every wall

I know that I could be detrimental to your world
But you run circles 'round my excuses to let you in
It's a heady feeling, wanting more than I deserve
You make it easy for me to allow the draw and rush

(to fall in love)
(to fall in love)

You cast my fears off with a kiss
You keep the jackals bound by chains
Decorate old Hell with new bliss
Seduce like absinthe and champagnes

I don't know how you do it
Picking flowers where shadows fall
Take my tears and make diamonds
With a glance, break down every wall

I know that I could be detrimental to your world
But you run circles 'round my excuses to let you in
It's a heady feeling, wanting more than I deserve
You make it easy for me to allow the draw and rush

(to fall in love)
(to fall in love)

© Kay Irvin

Muse

You tempt me with your smile
Write poetry with your sighs
Paint my eyes, you're versatile
Roused my sleeping butterflies
(never felt this before)
(never knew I wanted to)

Wanna disappear
Inside you, again and again
And never let this fire end
Not touch, not hear, not know anything else
Only how much you mean to me
What I've prayed for, what I've ached for
You have awakened
Don't you know love awaits epiphany?

You need to understand
A Muse can be inspired too
I'm just like clay in your hand
Sculpt my heart for only you
(never felt this before)
(never knew I wanted to)

Wanna disappear
Inside you, again and again
And never let this fire end
Not touch, not hear, not know anything else
Only how much you mean to me
What I've prayed for, what I've ached for
You have awakened
Don't you know love awaits epiphany?

A million kisses wouldn't be enough
'Cause only more love heals this bleeding love

(I wanna burn with you)
(Into the ethereal)

(I wanna burn with you)
(Into the ethereal)

© Kay Irvin

~ did a bit of a tilt on this one
A Muse can inspire ... But also be inspired

Unrequited

Can't imagine you'd deny me
Can't let myself fall to despair
I believe in happy endings
Just want the start to find you care

Enable me to come closer
Hypnotic, you're drug in my veins
And no, there can't be another
Or nothing left of me remains

Unrequited, unrequited (love)
So excited for the chance
You'll put me above (the rest)
Unrequited, unrequited (love)
Darling, ignited in trance
You're all I think of (my quest)

You're an angel, I'm your devil
Thinking of you explicitly
Touch, feeling your breath on my neck
Holding you, tasting, heavenly

Your name is honey on my tongue
An indulgence and I repeat
Within my slow dreams and soft moans
A fever,... salt, sweat, dripping sweet

Unrequited, unrequited (love)
So excited for the chance
You'll put me above (the rest)
Unrequited, unrequited (love)
Darling, ignited in trance
You're all I think of (my quest)

© Kay Irvin

Saudade

Tell me your fears
And I'll tell you mine
Watch the sunset
Bleeding love streaks 
Across the skyline

Dear, hold your breath
Make wishes, then sleep
Dream of me, there
My tender touch
Yours to ever keep

We are apart
But my presence stays
And when night comes
Feel me with you
As the moonlight plays

Time is lonely
My empty bed waits
For your safe arms
For your exhale
As each wish creates

Love that remains, always
Love always remains

© Kay Irvin

The Whispering Trees

Obscure light, again bring flicker
Walls and portraits rattle like bones
Darkly dread closes in thicker
When thunder drums with baleful tones

All souls come 'round, gather and share
Bind be for those who covet harm
Bid shed of our sorrows that snare
Let the rains sweep darkness with charm

Whispering trees, black rain, storm dwells
Leaves tip tears, glistering ground wells
But voices blend as wolfen wails
When slumberless candlelight swells

Foggy river bends, sketch out caim
Shadowcast loving memories
From the willows to wax and flame
Send warmth through weeping tapestries

All souls come 'round, gather and share
Bind be for those who covet harm
Bid shed of our sorrows that snare
Let the rains sweep darkness with charm

Whispering trees, black rain, storm dwells
Leaves tip tears, glistering ground wells
But voices blend as wolfen wails
When slumberless candlelight swells

© Kay Irvin

~ a circle of protection, in times of need
Those we love are with us, always

Limerence

Love sends out but does not come back
And a restless mind cannot sleep,
As the night and darkest places,
- everything goes black

The need to make you feel
The need to make it real
- may take you by surprise
It's a long time coming,
For this devoted, lovelorn Soul

You don't know what it's like
To watch the one you love
- love someone else
You don't know what it's like
To live so intensely
- lost within love, itself

I can't focus, nothing is clear 
And the days seem smothered by cold,
As the Winter blankets the ground, 
- the world could disappear

The need to have you see
The need to have you be
- the one who fills this void
It's all that matters now,
For this devoted, lovelorn Soul 

You don't know what it's like
To watch the one you love
- love someone else
You don't know what it's like
To live so intensely
- lost within love, itself

Take my heart, all of me
You've already stolen my Soul
And love is slowly killing me
But I just can't let go

© Kay Irvin

note:
Many things interest me and I write about
all sorts of things; hauntings, ghosts, vampires, werewolves, dark, gothic, nightmares (often) ...
wolves (definitely) ...
And (in reference to) likes/beliefs/old ways; nature, night time, weather, Wiccan, the elements, seasons ...
And emotions; love, anger, rage, sadness
and hurt - some from myself but also
from what others discuss, or from music,
artwork and movies. (a bit of everything)
But I also sometimes write about things
in relation to kind of physcological topics;
depression, rumination ... Limerence
A sunny, Summer, butterflies & glitter gal,
I'm not. :)
There's a great article on 'Limerence'
and I want to share the link because it,
(and the person who wrote it) can explain
it far better than I could.
~ Thanks

http://bthaw.blogspot.com/2011/08/guide-to-limerence.html?m=1

The Damned

It was a beautiful dream
But it was taken away
People aren't what they seem
- just passing through without stay

A nothing love, a thousand sunsets
Ghostly memories of silhouettes
- Oh, they taunt and beckon for the damned

And when the room draws empty
Bitter honesty is known
It's better than being with another
Who wears a lie and makes you feel alone

Pirouettes and masquerade
Moving poetry, melodies glide
Though the outcome is unswayed
When the mask falls, you see what's inside

And when the room draws empty
Bitter honesty is known
It's better than being with another
Who wears a lie and makes you feel alone

A nothing love, a thousand sunsets
Ghostly memories of silhouettes
- Oh, they taunt and beckon for the damned

© Kay Irvin

Nightfall

When will this long Summer end?
The sunlight has not been a friend
I wait for darkness,... to descend

In the stillness 
In the shadows
There is a truth
When hurry slows
Pale, distant lights
Soft wind may call
But just a name
Into nightfall

Pictures and memories burn
They've taken enough, had their turn
Something new is easy to yearn

Time passed, still much is ahead 
It won't own me or be mislead 
When only a whisper's been said

I'll be here, when echoes come through,
Without fear, as the seasons change
I'll be closer to finding you

In the stillness 
In the shadows
There is a truth
When hurry slows
Pale, distant lights
Soft wind may call
But just a name
Into nightfall

© Kay Irvin

Pull-Push

I'm so ... nice and sweet
I'm angry and cold
You so ... want me here
You want me to go

Write me love letters
Write me a hate rant
Really, moody much?
(- tantrum slices slant)

Go on, call me names
'Cause I mute at will
Opened up my life 
But kept secrets, still

Say I self-pity
- that's a load that's full
You wallow in it,
Hypocritical 

All that's wrong with me
- is people like you,
who make me confused
Pull me close to you
And how you love me
Tick-tock, five seconds
And how you judge me
Push me away, it's a mind game - cliché,
Manipulate emotions and betray
Lash out - you don't want anyone to stay
You intentionally hurt, make it play

My phone will have no answer
As mail, return to sender
No more of your whiplash mock
Straight to spam, delete and block

© Kay Irvin

Embraced

Bound to thee, bound beneath the new moon
By four directions, four elements
We enter this soul dance, sacred rune

Among fire, water, earth and air
This beginning ends our wandering
So mote it be - Lord, Lady ... declare

And I give you my heart completely
I give you all I am and shall be
Darkness, love and light, I bind to thee

Wrists and ribbons, do not separate
Each to the other, now,... we are one
Vow, promised circle, we dedicate

Kindred ritual knows no sever
Blessed, in perfect love and perfect trust
One year, one day, unto forever

And I give you my heart completely
I give you all I am and shall be
Darkness, love and light, I bind to thee

We honor what death, itself, will never take
(Embraced)

© Kay Irvin

Deadfall

If you walk away, don't turn back
I've had enough, given 'til it hurts
I've watched how you change and it's strange
- this stranger who only likes to flirt
(with a spiral of tragedy)

Touch and go, for so long it's been
I can't be the strong one all the time
Love is a convenience for you
- some twisted illusion, depths I climb
(wreckage, I can't take anymore)

When you're high and drinking
- that's when you start thinking,
how much I mean to you
Reality, otherwise, 
with the come down in your eyes,
warns of a deadfall on cue

You should want to be here
but it's clear, you don't want to stay
You can be next to me
but you're a million miles away

© Kay Irvin

Pretty Lies

Over and over, time wastes away
I wait, only to - not hear from you
I only pretend
You say you want to be in my life
We're both going through things hard to take
And both need a friend

Again, you make us a guessing game
Will you be here or will you retreat?
I count on you, then the floor shatters
You're all in, then none of it matters
Lying to yourself, lying to me
Pretty lies that crumble, bittersweet

I reach out for arms that don't exist 
My words go out to an empty room
- a silent reply
I want to believe your convictions
You play to my vulnerable side
- only to deny

Again, you make us a guessing game
Will you be here or will you retreat?
I count on you, then the floor shatters
You're all in, then none of it matters
Lying to yourself, lying to me
Pretty lies that crumble, bittersweet

The day's coming and I won't be here
And you won't let me down anymore
All, what we could have is collapsing
Broken hearts, love crashing through the floor

© Kay Irvin

Veil of Starlight

Warm night, half-moon, lost sleep, cup of tea
Veil of starlight and I'm less lonely
Because the world is full of strangers
And I can't see his face when I dream
But I feel him, the breeze goes through me

I've watched others find something that's true
Some wish it away, some make it through
I would hold on with all that I have
What will be left, will I be enough?
Would numb hope be brave to start anew?

(Or will it never be?) 

I'll throw a wish up, to the night sky
- The first star ... and a veil of starlight
A veil of starlight
Veil of starlight

© Kay Irvin

Burning

Silence can be deafening
Madness can almost seem sane
Sometimes, barely holding on,
When warmth comes to ease the pain

(that's my devoted angel)

Sweet embers, wrapping around 
Close my eyes, he's got my back
No one's ever kept me safe 
He's haven when skies turn black

I can hear him
(and feel his embrace) -
I'm the man who loves you
Don't hold back from me
Trust me, let me in
Show me your love and darkness
I'll split the two 
Love is all that's returning
(Burning)

He doesn't shy from sadness  
He doesn't deny my rage
He understands how it feels,
When confusion's like a cage

I can break down, he's got this
I know peace when he's with me,
Sheltering my tears and fears
- Strong, definite, fiery

(that's my relentless angel)

I can hear him
(and feel his embrace) -
I'm the man who loves you
Don't hold back from me
Trust me, let me in
Show me your love and darkness
I'll split the two 
Love is all that's returning
(Burning)

(oh, such a rousing angel)
(Love ignites the way)
(Burning)
(Burning)

© Kay Irvin

The Break

Starting out, world at your feet
And the future in your hands
Kicked down but each time you stand
Nothing seems to go as planned

And the walls are closing in
Suffocating
Again and again
Only so much you can take
- to the break

Cry until you crawl to scream
It seems like a million tears
Forgot what it's like to dream
Push yourself to the extreme

Some know the break
... because you've had to be strong
- for so long

And the walls are closing in
Suffocating
Again and again
Only so much you can take
- to the break

Hold on, hold on, hold on 
- 'til this paralyzing feeling's gone
Will it ever be?

© Kay Irvin

Eternal Love

Something in your eyes
I recognize
A place no one understands
Wanting not to stay
(just get away)
But it's all out of your hands

Maybe I cast more of a shadow than of a light
But I swear, I will cradle you on a frozen night
When your fears fall around
And the echoing pain won't subside
These arms will be here, strong for you,
with eternal love

Black diamond gaze
Often a haze
Heavy load atop broken stone
Tremendous sorrow
(Not tomorrow)
You will not face it alone

Maybe I cast more of a shadow than of a light
But I swear, I will cradle you on a frozen night
When your fears fall around
And the echoing pain won't subside
These arms will be here, strong for you,
with eternal love

Lullaby of my heart, beating true
I am here,... always, right here for you,
with eternal love

© Kay Irvin

Crimson Kiss

Scent of nervousness
Sensing I'm threat ... to your inhibitions
I know tenderness
Or is your mind set on superstitions?

Light's far to the East
The bright moon can illuminate instead
Here, there is no beast
Only the fears you dance with, in your head

Your skin has a taste ... like blood
Honeyed on the lips ... like love
Just a brush
Sweetness, hush
Let me calm your heart
Don't worry
There is no hurry
Nothing eases panged flurry
- like a crimson kiss

Give yourself, willing
My mate, beloved,... tell me we're alright
Go with pulse-spilling 
And I'll take you each and every night

Your skin has a taste ... like blood
Honeyed on the lips ... like love
Just a brush
Sweetness, hush
Let me calm your heart
Don't worry
There is no hurry
Nothing eases panged flurry
Nothing eases fanged fury
- like a crimson kiss

(the dark has much beauty,... share it with me)
(the dark has much beauty,... share it with me)

© Kay Irvin

Fairytale

He was more than a Prince,
more than King
He was her everything
And no woman could hold a candle to her
She was fire, itself
Together, they loved a love never known,
never dreamed
Once upon a time

© Kay Irvin

Lodestar

As the moondust, shimmering
Ethereal, maddening
- houses such unsung longing
(you lead desire)

Cold world, chilled memories
Billow through the brimming trees
But thoughts of you warm and tease
(unhad fire)

Starlight come, fill my body
Guide my wait, craving,... tell me
(oh, bring it true)
Would you quiver with my touch?
Could you ever want me as much
(- as I do you?)
(- as I do you?)

Am I hopeless, am I wrong
- to ache for something so strong?
Is your heart where I belong?
(oh, do I dare?)

I've gone to the edge and leapt
And that's where this course has kept
Please, say you'll love me to death
(take all mine, there)

Starlight come, fill my body
Guide my wait, craving,... tell me
(oh, bring it true)
Would you quiver with my touch?
Could you ever want me as much
(- as I do you?)
(- as I do you?)

Dust and starlight, loving you
Dust and starlight, loving you

© Kay Irvin

Recipe For Hope

The ingredients to aspire are tricky
Positiveness, though the better consideration
- should be only a dash,
While caution should be in heaps
Measurement is everything

© Kay Irvin

Dark Side of the Sun

In the hours before dawn 
Fog is rolling 'cross the hills
- Like old ghosts ... but I believe
All turned out, as it should be
I saw you change
I watched you leave

Memories are dangerous
And better left where they are
I wore my heart on my sleeve
Piece by piece, taken from me
Faces did change
I watched them leave

(more than my share of goodbyes)
People come and people go

Dark side of the sun is cold
And its truths are hard to bear
(more than my share ... of goodbyes)
People come and people go
- such a brutal honesty
I saw them change
I watched them leave

I want love ... someone to stay
And not deceive
I too, am a ghost,... haunting
- misty dreams,... will the sun see?

(misty dreams,... will the sun see?)

© Kay Irvin

Masterpiece

Loving you is my masterpiece
Nothing could ever be as meaningful
- your heartbeat on a kiss
- the soul of your eyes, welcoming me home
... perfection

© Kay Irvin

Looking Glass (Mirror Gazing)

I.
Mirror me black ice, which black diamonds cannot surpass
Whose surface reflects back to thine, mirror me black glass
Gaze into, let me gaze through and as we meet the tween
Time be torn, reach be warm and lift the candlelight's sheen

II.
Mirror me perception, whose deception and be clear
Consequences from their facts of fiction will know spear
Match their jabs in one pinprick and bind all further deed
Where from poison tongues lead thorny lips to spew with greed

III.
Mirror me the enemy who comes in guise of friend
Don't you agree such treachery should feel bite they send?
Perhaps they'll greet return, clothed 'neath sheep's veil, as they wore
But find a wolf with pearled fangs, hungry to even score

IV.
Mirror me the love I've dreamt but yet to call by name
Whose beating heart, I quite often sense with rhythm same
In this life or the other side, I confide, I wait
Show the one who follows me, whose soul shall be thy mate

V.
Mirror me calm and hush, when turmoil surrounds and drains
Fill draped windows with storms and wash confusion with rains
Thirteen wishes and thirteen kisses, before I'm done
And care to thee, 'til again, our gaze will be as one

© Kay Irvin

Promises, Promises

Your schemes caused screams and lucid dreams
Restlessness forced days coursed for grief
Grace me with your presence and thence
You stole sanity like a thief

I should be grateful for the game
I should eat hateful, take the blame
  for all the broken promises,... 
  you made --
Promises, promises

Artificial, sacrificial
Cherry pick how you stick the plunge
Portray martyr, walk on water
You're diamond dealer, I'm too grunge

What miserable life of strife
How tiring, drama without gain
I leave you behind, nil I find
Crux lacks luxe, odious-sartain

I should be grateful for the game
I should eat hateful, take the blame
  for all the broken promises,... 
  you made --
Promises, promises

(broken)
Promises, promises

© Kay Irvin

Ghosts Among the Forest

Sweet day's death casts spell of heady stars,
Of waxing moons and cloaked avatars
And those kindred beasts peer out to see,
I in the beast and the beast in me

The midnight owl asks whose steps saunter,
Whose glow and blink be fearless haunter
Low growl, paws, crunch and leaves that fracture,
Move muscled arch, stead for fanged capture

Appearance, as heavenly as dream,
Pauses staunch stance by cool, rippled stream
And Wolfen sniff to the air incites,
Near to a dozen, as one, recites

The deer, the rabbit, the fowl provoke
Synergy of pack hastens evoke
Breeze carries a whiff of woods and blood
My own sate is awakened with flood

Torn flesh, born fresh, pulled, syphoned with need,
Lap up warm froth when hungry mouths feed
And tiny frames are guided to learn
Gentle coax nuzzles, then to take turn

I soon recall moreover savage,
Upright betrayal with aimed ravage
But peace comes easy from these wild friends
Devout coexistence never ends

This world can be lonely and cold,
Kinship starved, reeling lost, feeling old
Such immortal symphony stirs tear,
I with the beast and beast's beauty near

Shared, quiet sense strolls with tender graze,
Gingerly, pass exits forest haze
O'er dewy grass, crossing the glade,
Where treetops meld like backdrops, which fade

Ghostly nightshade fills with lupine song,
Resonate of choir, which I belong
And those kindred beasts peer out to see,
I in the beast and the beast in me

© Kay Irvin

~ for the beautiful wolves

Rebellion of the Social Misfits

Outsiders are made, not accidentally created. 
Whether it's coworkers, neighbors, friends or family, outsiders are the ones who say 'no', the ones who stand up for themselves and the ones who don't bend under the pressure of not belonging.
A lot of people have been there.
I've been there.
One of the biggest fears of many people, is that you won't fit it or that you'll be put outside of a circle. It's usually a circle of troublemakers, who get off on gossiping lies. It's a false sense of feeling included with mind-gamers who supposedly have your best interest at heart and want you to have the inside scoop on what they deem as communication, which bonds unity. 

Rebellion be the Hellion; that courageous square peg in a round world.
If you can get past the fear, life is on the other side.

Troublemakers will make half-assed threats that if you don't do something they want or if you don't stay away from someone or another group of folks, then you'll be emotionally punished, implying how you would be at risk of being all alone. That's their way of causing a divide and being a bully to keep you under their control. People have to think for themselves, use their heads and not be lazy by saying they know all about someone, when they actually base their beliefs on the opinions of others, for a particular individual. 

The last thing troublemakers want is to see someone they've oust be part of anything and know the peace of true belonging with others, besides the scope they would allow. They want individuals to lead a sorrowful life and feel damned via exclusion.

If anyone, you thought was a friend, won't listen to your side and have an interest in your pain, then they've already decided to exclude you. 
And they'll make up things about you (referencing facts) and guide others, within a circle, to stay clear of you. Truth will be hidden in layers of lies.
If others want to believe every lie as gospel (truth), take the bait, get hooked and be controlled by a circle, then it's genuinely liberating to not be a part of it.

It's all about finding people who will listen, will understand and will get how overrated that stuck-up, little circle is.
Then, you have your own place to call home.
Those who made you an outsider will hate it because they'll know that it's your turn to talk about them for a change, oust their behavior and have loyalty with like-minded souls who've been through the same ostracization.
Outsiders protect their own and make their own pack. 
We are the social misfits and the ones certain, hypocritical circles would throw away.
It's a high ... to feel acceptance and love, when smug hypocrites would enjoy causing you depression by saying you're a waste. 
Be brave, be alone ... until you find caring people who know the road you've been down because they've been on the same journey.

© Kay Irvin

Karma

I share my life with a pretty baby (with paws),
fangs, fur and fire in her blood
She has a perfect name
And I'll show her care and love
through the years ahead
We will have trust and loyalty
I will protect her and she'll keep me safe
Crudely but in reference to canine-wise, 
she is a bitch
However, she won't bite me in the ass
(but a bitter enemy-heart is a different story)

© Kay Irvin

Non-Lament

He came to me, offering support, strength and closeness
He asked me questions, seemingly interested
He said he loved the way I thought
and the way I was, as a whole
But the nagging, leery part of me kept me cautious 
And ... so quickly came ... a change
Less questions
Less curiosity
Less support
More leaning on me
More, I was the strong one
More, I had the grit,
while his backbone often slumped limp
And I learned his tells
- how he faked initiative and surety
with a slight bad boy impersonation
He started making fun of me
- putting me down
- lashing out against the very way I was
But it was the same,
as once, he had said he loved
Time was like the slow burn of a razor blade
- temper tantrums and boyish sulk
I had no patience for it
He easily let me go and moved on to another

I imagine him now
- the faux pose, in black leather, atop a motorcycle,
like some character from a biker TV show
And I am thankful 
to be among the living, even though single,
better so, than a dead world of endless days and empty nights 
I guess he could hold unpleasant thoughts of me
And I might be hurt, if I wasn't moreover drawn to being appreciative of fate

© Kay Irvin

Ghost Girl

I remember watching people leave
But I had thought intentions would keep
Naïveté can kill over time
Slowly, clearly, as their true stripes creep

And as a twisted vine of ivy,
black thistles of shattered trust did sweep

You promised love, embraced me with care
Then,... walked past me, like I wasn't there
(Ghost Girl) ... 'what a waste and God's mistake'
- I heard you say and I died, inside, 
crumbled with pain, world tumbled to break
(because of the lies)
(there's ghosts in my eyes)

When closeness unraveled to strangers,
heft of their shadows darkened the sky
They never knew me and I not them
How easily they let go but why?

And 'why' rings through my deadfall and stays
- Unanswered call but tears have gone dry

May my torment haunt you, all your days
(Ghost Girl) ... ghosts in her eyes return gaze

© Kay Irvin

Whitechapel

Blood on the streets, stench in the air
1888, Butcher's Row, despair
Slaughterhouses spill the shuffle
The pubs hustle to some lamplight scuffle
Bobby whistles scream but the Ripper is no where

East end fog licks a dirty gem
Velvet bonnet and tattered hem
I'll do such things, such crafty things
Inside out and a few pence spread
I'll cut the sin right out of them 
It may be 'neath a harlot's moon 
But I'm going to paint it red
They will beg my blade and wish they were dead

A night's lodging, bread square and sleep
- Be the highest hope, if four pence will keep
Wipe a tear, smile and show some skirt
There's your lady, say how no one gets hurt
Raise the flounce, collect, sow and so soon shall you reap

'Jack' is the name on frightened lips
Eluding, he's a caper, always slips
God save the Queen and us as well
London mist has become his home from Hell
- Phantom with a lust to kill sure as more flesh rips

East end fog licks a dirty gem
Velvet bonnet and tattered hem
I'll do such things, such crafty things
Inside out and a few pence spread
I'll cut the sin right out of them 
It may be 'neath a harlot's moon 
But I'm going to paint it red
They will beg my blade and wish they were dead

© Kay Irvin

~ about: Jack the Ripper, Whitechapel murders

Magic

You snapped your fingers once
But decided that wasn't enough
You snapped your fingers twice
Voilà, I was no more in your life
(Magic) 
(like a demon winged in flight)

You waved your tiny wand
Illusionary promises (gone)
I thought you were so strong
The damn smoke and mirrors proved that wrong
(Magic)
(clearly, you want doe eyed fawn)

(Magic)
(it was time to disappear)
(Magic) 
(and 'goodbye' tasted great year)

He's all man, not like you
No tiny wand or slight of hand queue
He mesmerizes (true)
His hands know exactly what to do

And he loves me, like you never would
Mind, body, soul, like you never could

(yes) -- He has what you took for granted
Now, snap my fingers,-- Ciao! -- you're the fool
(Magic) 
(hot-sugar, I'm his, mad-cool)
(Magic) 
(hot-sugar, he's mine, mad-cool)
(Oh, how I love him, magic-mad-cool)

© Kay Irvin

Child of God

Your shiny crucifix hangs,
as a meaningful symbol of good
But how you look down on me,
judge and cast me off, misunderstood

You purge, bid my heart to bleed
Forget that I feel and need
Command, tongue-lash like a lightning rod
Left by your insufferable deed
But aren't we all a child of God?
You'd have me broken, kneeling with plead
But aren't we all a child of God?

You quote a book, bound in black
So soon, you condemn my dark repose
Remove love, add pain, mix well
Mind-muck, blend 'til only anger grows

You purge, bid my heart to bleed
Forget that I feel and need
Command, tongue-lash like a lightning rod
Left by your insufferable deed
But aren't we all a child of God?
You'd have me broken, kneeling with plead
But aren't we all a child of God?

Not such pious disciple
You like it too much, worshipping purge
Those dirty, little secrets
- know you're wanton Dom, whip-cracking urge

But aren't we all a child of God?
You'd have me broken, kneeling with plead
But aren't we all a child of God?

Oh, aren't we all a child of God?
Oh, aren't we all a child of God?

(and the Sub will rise up, blood red dawn)

~ side note:
I like 'The Purge' movies, so this was written
in part, from the idea of that ...
But - also from some people, once close to me,
who wear crosses, refer to the bible, prayer or a deity,
and/or attend places of fellowship.

[And I respect all religions and beliefs.
I have love for anyone who has love for me,
irregardless of religious, political, personal,
or any views]

But, as I've said, some people, once close to me, 
choose to live their lives far from their convictions 
and part-time, practicing ways.
I don't respect their lies, gossip and the lustful hurt they like to impose.
In the past, I took the brunt of some of their slams. (not anymore)
We aren't close anymore.
I wouldn't be broken.

© Kay Irvin

Excerpt From A Journal That Was Never Written

Date: None
Time: Zero
Feeling: Dead Inside

I paused and cautiously smiled
Hoping for some caring reassurance
But he was cold and indifferent
... and weakly muttered,
'Where do we go from here?'
I knew in that instance ...
He wasn't capable of living satisfied, (content)
- with just us, with just ... being
I felt my heart sink ...
and the slight, tattered bit of peace,
that I was desperately trying to hold on to,
- drained from my body
I would never be good enough
He would always search for
- something more, something better
I was only a mere stop and stepping stone
... on his way

© Kay Irvin

Haiku Rebel

I wrote a haiku,
Past seventeen syllables
Page became poem

© Kay Irvin